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i choked on a rather large...
...space platypus egg, but...
...it hatched and became my friend, I named it....
Bill.
...The big fat rooster...
...of the Apocalypse. I trained him to...
...screw...
lightbulbs into...
..his right nostril, and now..
...with an electric wire up his ass..
the lightbulb lights, and...
...he crows "You Light Up My Life" in a piercing falsetto. The light from his right nostril revealed...
...my lucky penny on the ground! I had lost it when I was...
...looking for my lucky SCP action figure...
~Cpt. Overkill~
~Cpt. Overkill~
which was currently serving in my place in Afgahnistan...
...because I had "bent my wookie."
...This so-called "wookie" really was a...
......space gorrila with bad dental higene and a sore throat......
...it kept screaming "more cap ships, more cap ships" so I...
spontaneously combusted.