Our new players are kinda broken. It seems every single day there is one asking such ultra basic questions like "how do I dock".

I finally have a suggestion as to how to fix atleast that problem.

We need a bot, somehting big like a behemoth that sits in every newb sector and does nothing but dock and undock, continuously.

The reason for a behemoth, preferably bright yellow? Make it easy to see.

It should be called "[sector] Docking Bot"

Over the sector chat it should "Enter is the default activate key, I am here to show you how to dock" I guess every time it undocks.

Haha, it won't matter anyways. The obvious problem is that they do not read at all.

Clearly video tutorials are in order.

People will always miss well written instructions. Interesting mechanics breed various levels of complexity, which will always dumbfound somebody. The fact that there's only one each day asking that question is probably not a bad ratio.

I also don't think a bright yellow Moth, continuously docking and undocking, would illustrate anything to someone who can't read instructions in the first place.

Video tuts on the other hand, as Maalik has suggested, would likely work. Incorporating them into the game on the other hand...

Remedial reading classes too

and yea i think im going to make some video tutorials soon.

How about we just don't allow anyone to undock for the first time until they pass a written test on docking procedures. That would have the added benefit of being realistic... you don't just hand out pilot licenses like free condoms at the campus health clinic.

Just blow them up, which will allow them to return to the station without any of that pesky docking nonsense.

Now you're talking, a bot that comes and kills them for asking "how do i dock" on 100

a bot that comes and kills them for asking "how do i dock" on 100

*Dr. Lecter

....you don't just hand out pilot licenses like free condoms at the campus health clinic.
....Just blow them up, which will allow them to return to the station
Here at VO we are very serious about newb protection......LOL

If the short yellow moth mined for a few minutes and then returned....Maybe

That give me a GREAT idea, have the bot instead of a behemoth, be a short bus.

I still remember fondly hosing down the arta j12 station with rockets as the newbs turbo furiously into the undocking bay.

Sooo, LNH, you like to *hose down* newbs' *short buts* with your rocket? Damn dude!

Anyway, real newbs dont ask questions.

Newbs will be newbs, fucking morons, let's not try to change that, they make up many of people's pks :)

Maybe a instructor bot offered as optional, who does all 1st flight while popping up big windows with required keys and brief instructions?

what's a condom?

that thing that your parents have wished they used ever since that fateful night

pwnd