This is intended as a repository for funny in-game quotes. Please edit your logs down to the relevant parts prior to posting.

Previous Funny Quotes threads:
2014: http://www.vendetta-online.com/x/msgboard/1/28370
2013: http://www.vendetta-online.com/x/msgboard/1/26952
2012: http://vendetta-online.com/x/msgboard/1/26049
2011: http://www.vendetta-online.com/x/msgboard/1/24526
2007-2011: http://www.vendetta-online.com/x/msgboard/1/16922

[17:01] <vo2> [100] <Vskye> ohhh, I TGFT party .. two tridents here if any ONE is interested. heh
[17:01] <vo2> [100] <Dirty 'oRe> why in the fuck would i go to two TGFT tridents?
[17:02] <vo2> [100] <Dirty 'oRe> what the hell are you smoking Vskye
[17:02] <vo2> [100] <Vskye> lol
[17:02] <vo2> [100] <Dirty 'oRe> two fucking serco on and you wanna talk shit
[17:02] <vo2> [100] <Vskye> your confused again
[17:02] <vo2> [100] <Dirty 'oRe> go fuck yourself
[17:02] <vo2> [100] <Fleet Consumer> Lolz
[17:03] <vo2> [100] <Darth Nihilus> haha
[17:03] <vo2> [100] <Darth Nihilus> that was such a quick response

18:44 vo2 [100] <(Exos) Mcht. Murray> can i buy 26 aquean for a high price?
18:44 vo2 [100] <draugath> I'll sell you 26 aquean for 100k each.
18:45 vo2 [100] <RelayeR> giggle
18:45 vo2 [100] <(Exos) Mcht. Murray> dude, not a deal.
18:45 vo2 [100] <A-Dawg> ^^ draugath is a crook
18:45 vo2 [100] <Vigilance> you said buy for a high price
18:45 vo2 [100] <Savet> that's a deal for someone...
18:45 vo2 [100] <Vigilance> that's a high price
18:45 vo2 [100] <(Exos) Mcht. Murray> i meant more 3000 a piece, not that.
18:46 vo2 [100] <RelayeR> go to an ice roid and mine them for free
18:46 vo2 [100] <(Exos) Mcht. Murray> aquean normally sells for about 251 each, and im offering 3000 each cause im lazy.
18:46 vo2 [100] <draugath> ... in less time than it would take to get the seller to you.
18:46 vo2 [100] <RelayeR> 0.o
18:46 vo2 [100] <Dirty 'oRe> mine it.
18:46 vo2 [100] <(Exos) Mcht. Murray> nah -_-
18:46 vo2 [100] <draugath> not wanting to mine 26 aquean isn't just lazy.
18:47 vo2 [100] <RelayeR> it's "i don't want to get up, go to the fridge and get a beer" lazy
18:47 vo2 [100] <Savet> that's why man invented wives
18:48 vo2 [100] <Savet> it's best to have multiple wives so they can take turns getting the beer
18:50 vo2 [1] <AtomicFlame3.0> will you shut up

Haha this reply.
http://www.vendetta-online.com/x/msgboard/1/29299?page=3#355392

<Savet>24 HOUR CHAT MUTE IS RAPE*

*This is a mild paraphrasing

<Fleet Consumer> lol I could mute you.

A bit of time

<[syn]n00b> speaking of waggling, "Fleet Consumer," are you still working on that mute?
<[syn]n00b> or did you "decide to take the high road"?
<Fleet Consumer> I do not have the time.
<[syn]n00b> I see

"Warhorse and Hasra, I'd love to show you the ropes."

http://www.vendetta-online.com/x/msgboard/1/6367?page=6

Not to steal, but a direct link for yours Greenwall: http://www.vendetta-online.com/x/msgboard/1/6367?page=6#356529

<Thor Wotansen> bots need to go boom
<Queen Defender A-1> so do you
<Logan5> oggle
<Thor Wotansen> make me
<cintar> loins roar and hunt
<Thor Wotansen> kinky

<Ecka Estenk> the main thing you get with a sub is the confidence of other players to put time and effort into helping you develop .

[14:18] <vo2> [100] <Dirty 'oRe> what language do you know
[14:18] <vo2> [100] <Fraspex> what language u speak
[14:19] <vo2> [100] <Fraspex> mexican?
[14:19] <vo2> [100] <DF will> what your usual use to chat? i only know facebook and twitter
[14:19] <vo2> [100] <Dirty 'oRe> and troll?
[14:19] <vo2> [100] <DF will> chinese
[14:20] <vo2> [100] <Dirty 'oRe> ya we asked you that
[14:20] <vo2> [100] <A-Dawg> Chinese isn't a language. Mandarin or Cantonese?
[14:20] <vo2> [100] <Dirty 'oRe> and you responded with social media
[14:20] <vo2> [100] <Fraspex> press tab to return a private message, message me df will
[14:20] <Kierky> !Chinese is a language, Mandarin and Cantonese are dialects.
[14:20] <vo2> [100] <FlyingSaucer> written version is basically identical
[14:21] <vo2> [100] <Tokkella-Po Koshala> That's a highly controversial topic Ancient
[14:21] <vo2> [100] <Tokkella-Po Koshala> And it depends on what definition of a language you use.
[14:22] <Kierky> !but saying Chinese isn't a language is just straight up wrong
[14:22] <vo2> [100] <Fraspex> its straight up wong
[14:22] <Savet> chinese is a food.
[14:22] <Kierky> !lol
[14:22] <vo2> [100] <Cpt. Zapp Brannigan> lol
[14:22] <vo2> [100] <A-Dawg> lol
[14:22] <Savet> and a variation of prostitute

a bit later

[14:25] <vo2> [100] <DF will> i think we hava difficulties in language communication
[14:25] <vo2> [100] <DF will> i can't understand some word without google
[14:25] <vo2> [100] <Dirty 'oRe> because you speak facebook

http://www.vendetta-online.com/x/msgboard/3/29841#357471

Genka wins. Again.

[03/12/15 16:48:22] <Mistena> You should go back to UIT space
[03/12/15 16:48:40] <foxesshadow> im off to pryios
[03/12/15 16:48:49] <Mistena> I cant allow that
[03/12/15 16:49:01] <foxesshadow> heck if got three ships
[03/12/15 16:49:13] <Mistena> Im under strict orders to not allow any trade into serco
[03/12/15 16:49:28] <foxesshadow> uit is sending me there
[03/12/15 16:49:37] <Mistena> Itani is prohibiting trade
[03/12/15 16:49:38] <foxesshadow> so i have to go... ugh
[03/12/15 16:49:47] [100] <foxesshadow> ...
[03/12/15 16:50:04] <foxesshadow> listen, i know you mean well
[03/12/15 16:50:16] <foxesshadow> but my mission was made quite clear
[03/12/15 16:50:24] <Mistena> as was mine
[03/12/15 16:50:28] <foxesshadow> get the data pad
[03/12/15 16:50:33] <foxesshadow> and get back
[03/12/15 16:50:42] (guild) [Ukari A-10] <Mistena> Targeting an EC-104 (100%, UIT), "foxesshadow", at 2405m
[03/12/15 16:50:51] <foxesshadow> im armed with a plasma hx and heavy armour
[03/12/15 16:51:04] <foxesshadow> and no offence,
[03/12/15 16:51:07] <Mistena> are you sure?
[03/12/15 16:51:15] <foxesshadow> but anything standing in my way
[03/12/15 16:51:22] <foxesshadow> i will open fire
[03/12/15 16:51:26] <Mistena> I can let you through if you bribe the Itani Council of Trade
[03/12/15 16:52:48] <foxesshadow> gotta jet then, wish me luck
[03/12/15 16:52:58] <Mistena> I cant allow that
[03/12/15 16:53:26] [100] <foxesshadow> well im already entering nitros, so little late
[03/12/15 16:53:26] <Mistena> Trade into serco space is strictly prohibited by Itani Council of Trade
[03/12/15 16:53:44] foxesshadow warped to Initros System, Sector O-12
[03/12/15 16:53:47] Mistena destroyed foxesshadow
[03/12/15 16:54:11] [100] <Mistena> Sorry sir, trade into serco territory is strictly prohibited by the Itani Council of Trade
[03/12/15 16:54:47] [100] <foxesshadow> and your in a huge pile of shit now
[03/12/15 16:55:16] [100] <foxesshadow> that was a diplomatic mission
[03/12/15 16:55:50] [100] <foxesshadow> mistena, that was set up by uit and secro
[03/12/15 16:56:11] [100] <foxesshadow> well i guess i have to go around you i a battle ship this time
[03/12/15 16:56:21] [100] <Mistena> Conspiring with the enemy, another charge to your list
[03/12/15 16:56:28] [100] <foxesshadow> i was following the assigned route
[03/12/15 16:56:40] [100] <foxesshadow> its not conspireing
[03/12/15 16:56:52] [100] <foxesshadow> its going to our stronghold
[03/12/15 16:56:57] [100] <foxesshadow> so
[03/12/15 16:57:11] [100] <foxesshadow> sorry, i may have to blow you up now
[03/12/15 16:57:22] [100] <Mistena> Ill have to bring that up the the Commander, UIT conspiracies with Serco trade
[03/12/15 17:05:49] [100] <foxesshadow> i hate secro, but UIT needs these targeting supplies
[03/12/15 17:06:02] [100] <Mistena> Itani has targeting supplies
[03/12/15 17:19:54] [100] <foxesshadow> im going to helios b-14
[03/12/15 17:20:20] [100] <foxesshadow> thats were i pick up the package
[03/12/15 17:20:37] [100] <foxesshadow> the package then goes to dau k-10
[03/12/15 17:20:58] [100] <foxesshadow> i cant its my last transport mission
[03/12/15 17:21:16] [100] <foxesshadow> ive beaten all the other ones
[03/12/15 17:21:40] [100] <foxesshadow> and if i have to use my programing skills to blow them up i wil
[03/12/15 17:21:43] [100] <foxesshadow> will
[03/12/15 17:21:55] [100] IRC_ <Nahin Lor> lol
[03/12/15 17:21:58] [100] <kbireta> lol, your programing skills, lol
[03/12/15 17:22:08] [100] <Elder> expecto blastonum!
[03/12/15 17:22:08] [100] <foxesshadow> im not afraid to start hacking, i dont want to but if i have to, so be it

[03/12/15 19:17:13] (guild) [Edras I-2] <experimental reclining chair> i withdrew guild money to buy 100 nukes from panthers bot which transfered the money to the bank again so panther paid for my nukes lol
[03/12/15 19:17:20] (guild) [Sedina D-14] <Nahin Lor> LOL
[03/12/15 19:17:21] (guild) [Latos H-2] <CrazySpence> haha love it

Slightly edited for readability, length.

[03/12/15 19:04:51] [665543] <Neon Black> starting the bidding for 326x Avalons (11 were sold today to phaserlight) you have 10 min
[03/12/15 19:04:59] [665543] <Nahin Lor> 10m
[03/12/15 19:05:01] [665543] <brzi95> nahh to long 15 min
[03/12/15 19:05:03] [665543] <Neon Black> 10min
[03/12/15 19:05:08] [665543] <Electricity> oh please. 5 minutes
[03/12/15 19:05:12] [665543] <experimental reclining chair> lolol
[03/12/15 19:05:14] [665543] <Nahin Lor> 5 is probably enough
[03/12/15 19:05:16] [665543] <Neon Black> go
[03/12/15 19:05:18] [665543] <brzi95> 1 mil
[03/12/15 19:05:19] [665543] <Nahin Lor> 10mil
[03/12/15 19:05:25] [665543] <brzi95> damn :/
[03/12/15 19:05:28] [665543] <Electricity> doh. 20 million
[03/12/15 19:05:30] [665543] <Nahin Lor> 25
[03/12/15 19:05:33] [665543] <Electricity> 35
[03/12/15 19:05:35] [665543] <Nahin Lor> 40
[03/12/15 19:05:38] [665543] <Electricity> 50
[03/12/15 19:05:39] [665543] <brzi95> 45
[03/12/15 19:05:39] [665543] <Nahin Lor> 55
[03/12/15 19:05:42] [665543] <Electricity> 60
[03/12/15 19:05:43] [665543] <brzi95> 60
[03/12/15 19:05:48] [665543] <Neon Black> bidding ends at 01:16:00
[03/12/15 19:05:49] [665543] <Nahin Lor> 100mil
[03/12/15 19:05:54] [665543] <Nahin Lor> sit kids :P
[03/12/15 19:05:57] [665543] <brzi95> 110
[03/12/15 19:06:00] [665543] <Electricity> haha
[03/12/15 19:06:01] [665543] <brzi95> :p
[03/12/15 19:06:14] [665543] <Nahin Lor> 120
[03/12/15 19:06:19] [665543] <brzi95> hmmm
[03/12/15 19:06:36] [665543] <Nahin Lor> brzi: give up now
[03/12/15 19:06:40] [665543] <Nahin Lor> you can't outbid me :P
[03/12/15 19:06:47] [665543] <brzi95> are you sure?
[03/12/15 19:06:49] [665543] <Nahin Lor> yes
[03/12/15 19:06:50] [665543] <Neon Black> nahin holds the floor at 120
[03/12/15 19:06:56] [665543] <Nahin Lor> you have no idea mate :P
[03/12/15 19:06:58] [665543] <experimental reclining chair> 130
[03/12/15 19:07:04] [665543] <Nahin Lor> 140
[03/12/15 19:07:05] [665543] <brzi95> heh :P
[03/12/15 19:07:15] [665543] <Nahin Lor> where'd a chair come by 100+mil? :P
[03/12/15 19:07:32] [665543] Nahin Lor puts on his lead auction shoes
[03/12/15 19:07:39] [665543] <brzi95> lols
[03/12/15 19:07:54] [665543] <experimental reclining chair> 141
[03/12/15 19:07:58] [665543] <brzi95> elektricity are you in this hahah
[03/12/15 19:08:06] [665543] <brzi95> yoi told its yours
[03/12/15 19:08:09] [665543] <Neon Black> 140 is the bid: nahin lor
[03/12/15 19:08:28] [665543] <experimental reclining chair> what?
[03/12/15 19:08:41] [665543] <Electricity> i sit on quite a few. i have a few minutes to consider if i want to higher this.
[03/12/15 19:08:47] [665543] <Electricity> @brzi
[03/12/15 19:08:57] [665543] <brzi95> nice nice
[03/12/15 19:09:03] [665543] <experimental reclining chair> what part of one million increments don't you understand?
[03/12/15 19:09:11] [665543] <Neon Black> if the bids are close i will allow a minute grace period to up-bid
[03/12/15 19:09:13] [665543] <Electricity> i think he does not like you Niki.
[03/12/15 19:09:21] [665543] <Nahin Lor> 10 mil increments >>>> 1 mil increments
[03/12/15 19:10:38] [665543] <Neon Black> nahin has the floor
[03/12/15 19:11:01] [665543] <Electricity> well atleast my bids aint ignored, Niki :P
[03/12/15 19:11:35] [665543] <Roda Slane> i had nothing left to say 60mil ago
[03/12/15 19:11:42] [665543] <Nahin Lor> lol
[03/12/15 19:11:50] [665543] <Nahin Lor> so it's chair's bid 141 or am I still holding at 140?
[03/12/15 19:11:58] [665543] <Electricity> Nahin, tell me, how high would you go on this?
[03/12/15 19:12:03] [665543] <Nahin Lor> higher than you
[03/12/15 19:12:06] [665543] <Electricity> What for example would you do if I said 145?
[03/12/15 19:12:09] [665543] <Nahin Lor> high as a frickin kite mang
[03/12/15 19:12:10] [665543] <Neon Black> Niki leads with 141
[03/12/15 19:12:15] [665543] <Nahin Lor> 142!
[03/12/15 19:12:18] [665543] <Electricity> Nahin was outbet!
[03/12/15 19:12:28] [665543] <Neon Black> is that yur bet Electricity ?
[03/12/15 19:12:34] [665543] <Nahin Lor> I'm in my lead auction shoes, I'm unstoppable
[03/12/15 19:12:37] [665543] <experimental reclining chair> OH **** 142????
[03/12/15 19:12:38] [665543] <Electricity> 145.
[03/12/15 19:12:47] [665543] <Neon Black> Electricity has the floor
[03/12/15 19:12:48] [665543] <Electricity> boom. now what nahin, huh, huh?
[03/12/15 19:12:49] [665543] <Nahin Lor> 146 :P
[03/12/15 19:12:51] [665543] <Electricity> ass.
[03/12/15 19:12:54] [665543] <Nahin Lor> no u
[03/12/15 19:12:59] [665543] <Electricity> :(

One can only imagine what Niki could do with 326 avalons.

03/20/15 01:53:28] [100] <Superfast Jellyfish> i fight for Narnia
[03/20/15 01:54:36] [100] <Thor Wotansen> where the fuck is narnia?
[03/20/15 01:54:48] [100] <Boda Shandis>idk ask west when he steps out of the closet

[Mon Mar 30 01:46:49 2015] (group) k'metreq destroyed Niki
[Mon Mar 30 01:47:39 2015] Shark destroyed k'metreq
[Mon Mar 30 01:47:39 2015] Combat +250
[Mon Mar 30 01:47:46 2015] [100] <Shark> baba k'merde
[Mon Mar 30 01:48:08 2015] [100] <k'metreq> baba niki
[Mon Mar 30 01:48:16 2015] [100] <Shark> he was afk
[Mon Mar 30 01:48:19 2015] [100] <Shark> anyway
[Mon Mar 30 01:48:33 2015] [100] <k'metreq> don't act like you have the nerve to do anything solo
[Mon Mar 30 01:49:20 2015] [100] <Shark> yeah, afk Niki helped me kill you
[Mon Mar 30 01:49:35 2015] [100] <k'metreq> i will be back, and you will hide or gank
[Mon Mar 30 01:50:04 2015] [100] <Rin Ganborro> Ah'noldtreq will triumph!
[Mon Mar 30 01:55:24 2015] Shark destroyed k'metreq
[Mon Mar 30 01:55:24 2015] Combat +250
[Mon Mar 30 01:55:33 2015] [100] <Shark> baba k'merde again
[Mon Mar 30 01:55:54 2015] [100] <Shark> I even gave you to shoot me in the back first this time
[Mon Mar 30 01:56:07 2015] [100] <k'metreq> nice lag
[Mon Mar 30 01:56:53 2015] [100] <k'metreq> and i would not have had to shoot you in the back, if you would stop running away
[Mon Mar 30 01:57:12 2015] [100] <Shark> i was stationary, lol

[07:20] <vo2> [100] <8east85jy> the only reason u target or acuse us is because u r jealous at how successful our guild is
[07:20] <vo2> [100] Elder facepalms
[07:20] <vo2> [100] Infamous saggy facepalms too