can this still run VO? If not, what would be a CHEAP device that could?

If you ran vo on it before, it will still run. There have been a few graphical updates on Android, but they can be disabled (the main one being fog blobs).

I can't even get it into the options menu. It goes through the update thing, I hit play, and it goes back to desktop. I don't really know much about smart phones or tablets.