despite safety fuses, a direct hit will still cause detonation. I have used flares at point blank, and had them detonate (in my face) because they smacked the other guys hull.

If you want to discourage ramming, keep the safety device: your munitions have prox fuses that won't arm themselves until they're 100m away from your ship. That's fine; it means you have to actually hit your target to boom them with a ram.

Thanks for your insight, Roda "Cpt. Obvious" Slane!