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Cheesy Jokes

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Jul 04, 2004 Santa link
Post really cheesy jokes here like why did snoop dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle
Jul 04, 2004 danielky link
Why did the chicken cross the road?


He wanted to.
Jul 04, 2004 Pyro link
A man walked into a bar. He said "ow".
Jul 04, 2004 danielky link
Maybe he tripped.

My joke:
A cow sat on a monkey. What did the monkey say?

You pattied on me.
Jul 04, 2004 Pyroman_Ace link
How do you make holy water? Boil the hell out of it!

Why cant blondes dial 911? They cant find the 11!

3 guys walk into a bar, you'd think one of them woulda seen it!
Jul 05, 2004 Forum Moderator link
I heard this today:

A termite walks in a bar and says "Is your bar tender here?"

Jul 05, 2004 Sheean link
Why do ducks have webbed feet?
So that they can stomp out fires.

Why do elephants have flat feet?
So they can stomp out burning ducks.
Jul 05, 2004 UncleDave link
After you have removed the pin, Mr. Grenade is no longer your friend.
Jul 05, 2004 mcnut link
whats the difference between your wife and your job?
your job still blows after 3 years
Jul 05, 2004 Pyroman_Ace link
McNut, somehow "I love it" just doesnt quite do it.....

You hear about the blonde that shot an arrow into the air? She missed.

Why are blonde jokes so short? So men can remember them

Why are blonde jokes so simple? So that brunettes can understand them.

Why did god make blondes? Because sheep couldn't bring beer from the fridge...why did god make brunettes? Because neither could the blondes.
Jul 06, 2004 danielky link
YEAH!!! SMART BRUNETTES!!

yeah...

You might be a redneck if you've been married 3 times and still have the same in-laws.

You might be a redneck if you put for your sex "yes" instead of M or F on your job application.
Jul 06, 2004 UncleDave link
What do you do if a blonde throws Mr. Grenade at you?

Pull out the pin and throw him back.
Jul 06, 2004 Pyroman_Ace link
Why was the blonde upset when she got her license? She got an "f" in sex.

The Rednecks Engineering Test:

Your uncle has a moonshine distellery operating at 5 gallons an hour. How many car radiators do you need?


(on grenade pin) Complaint Department, please take a number...
Jul 06, 2004 Spellcast link
So a priest a rabbi and a lawyer walk into a bar, the bartender looks up and says: "what is this some kind of joke?"

Why did the frog cross the road: (he was stapled to the chicken)

Jul 06, 2004 Santa link
You know whats funny?


A JOKE!!!
Jul 06, 2004 Pyroman_Ace link
A snail got attacked by two turtles. The snail went into the police department to file a statement. When asked if he saw his two attackers clearly, the snail replied "it all happened so fast!"


A man flew to Florida for a short vacation. His wife was set to join him the next day after a big conference. After arriving, the man prepared everything, checked into the hotel, rented a car, and even picked out a romantic restaurant. That night he sat down to type a breif e-mail to his wife. Unable to find the slip of paper with her address on it, he typed it out as best he could from memory. Unfortunately he missed the address by one letter and the email was sent to an elderly preachers widow who's husband had just died the previous day. When the old woman opened her email she dropped into a dead faint with a shreak. her bewildered family ran into the room and saw this on the screen:

HONEY, JUST ARRIVED, EVERYTHING SET FOR YOUR ARRIVAL TOMORROW.
-LOVE YOUR HUSBAND
PS: SURE IS HOT DOWN HERE!
Jul 06, 2004 silentsuicide link
Whats this? (Hold 3 fingers up and extend and retract them slowly) A flock of these! (Hold only 1 finger up and extend and rectract it slowly)

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?
Cause it was dead!

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHA im hilarious.
Jul 06, 2004 roguelazer link
Some funny bumper stickers:

=====

I just got a gun for my wife...
(it was the best trade I ever made)

Keep honking, I'm reloading.

Guns don't kill people, I do.

=====

And yes, all three of those came from the same truck.
Jul 07, 2004 Sheean link
What does a lightbeam and a pineapple have in common?

Nothing.
Jul 07, 2004 danielky link
You're family's so poor, you walked in the front of your house and fell out the back.

I saw this kid walking down the street the other day. He was kicking a can. I asked him if I could play. He said, "Play what?" I said, "Kick the Can, duh." He said, "No, I'm not playing a game, I'm moving!"