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US Military Authorizations (Do's and REALLY donts)
1) At no point am I authorized to do my famous Barbie Girl dance while on duty
2a) I'm not authorized to chew gum in formation unless I have enough for everyone
2b) (the next day) I'm not authorized to chew gum in formation even if I did bring enough for everybody
3) At no point am I to place my Officers photos on the War Criminal board despite whether or not I am right.
4) I am not permitted to wake my NCO by banging pots and pans over his head
5a) At no point may I have my stuffed animal on guard duty with me
5b) At no point may my stuffed animal search a vehicle
5c) At no point may I turn over my checkpoint to a stuffed animal
6) My call sign is "Private Hutchins" not "Princess Anistasia"
7) The Medic is "Medic Steele" not "Dr. Feelgood"
8) My supply officer is "Staff Seargent Patrick Lime" not "Sugar Daddy"
9) MREs aren't to be used as a personal lubricant (this is not a joke, this point was raised at a recent holiday gathering)
10) At no point am I authorized to throw my Seargent on the grenade to "heroicly save the squad"
11) At no point am I authorized to use another soldier as a personal floatation device.
Feel free to add your military authorizations here
2a) I'm not authorized to chew gum in formation unless I have enough for everyone
2b) (the next day) I'm not authorized to chew gum in formation even if I did bring enough for everybody
3) At no point am I to place my Officers photos on the War Criminal board despite whether or not I am right.
4) I am not permitted to wake my NCO by banging pots and pans over his head
5a) At no point may I have my stuffed animal on guard duty with me
5b) At no point may my stuffed animal search a vehicle
5c) At no point may I turn over my checkpoint to a stuffed animal
6) My call sign is "Private Hutchins" not "Princess Anistasia"
7) The Medic is "Medic Steele" not "Dr. Feelgood"
8) My supply officer is "Staff Seargent Patrick Lime" not "Sugar Daddy"
9) MREs aren't to be used as a personal lubricant (this is not a joke, this point was raised at a recent holiday gathering)
10) At no point am I authorized to throw my Seargent on the grenade to "heroicly save the squad"
11) At no point am I authorized to use another soldier as a personal floatation device.
Feel free to add your military authorizations here
SImply to continue adding and compounding to the stupidity comming out of my Battalion:
Recently the S-4 (supply) Seargent took an MRE Heater (they are water activated) and shoved it inside a Dasani waterbottle (full) and threw it in the trashcan...we then proceeded to sit back and watch the fun.
Sadly, we forgot 2 things: 1) That the trash can is cheap plastic
2) It was inside and being used frequently
So, we are sitting back, and 2 Junior girls walk by. At the same moment they pass, the trashcan explodes with great force...proceeding to cover the two girls in water, soda and other assorted wrappers.
Moral of the Story: Watch out for the Anchorage Alaska Trashbomber and his appretices
Recently the S-4 (supply) Seargent took an MRE Heater (they are water activated) and shoved it inside a Dasani waterbottle (full) and threw it in the trashcan...we then proceeded to sit back and watch the fun.
Sadly, we forgot 2 things: 1) That the trash can is cheap plastic
2) It was inside and being used frequently
So, we are sitting back, and 2 Junior girls walk by. At the same moment they pass, the trashcan explodes with great force...proceeding to cover the two girls in water, soda and other assorted wrappers.
Moral of the Story: Watch out for the Anchorage Alaska Trashbomber and his appretices
Lol, that's great.
yeah, when you assemble a bunch of teenagers, give them pretty much run of the school (which we ROTC guys have since, well, we're supposedly very well behaved (maybe, 60% of the time)) they're gonna use it to their advantage.
BTW: The trashcan was a total loss. It got cracked all the way down the side and best of all, we didnt get in any trouble. The Security guy showed up, said "You dumba*ses. Just don't do it again." and walked off
BTW: The trashcan was a total loss. It got cracked all the way down the side and best of all, we didnt get in any trouble. The Security guy showed up, said "You dumba*ses. Just don't do it again." and walked off
Shameless copy-paste from an email:
"Aim towards the Enemy."
-Instruction printed on US Army Rocket Launcher
"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend.
- USMC Training Bulletin
"Cluster bombing from B-52's is very, very accurate.
The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground."
-USAF literature
"If the enemy is in range, so are you."
- Infantryman's Journal
"A slipping trigger gear could let your M203 grenade
launcher fire when you least expect it. That would
make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit."
Army's Magazine of Preventive Maintenance.
"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over
the area you just bombed."
-US Air Force Manual
"Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo."
-Infantryman's Journal
"Tracers work both ways."
-US Army Ordnance Manual
"Five-second fuses only last three seconds."
-Infantryman's Journal
"Bravery is being the only one who knows you're
afraid." --David Hackworth
"If your attack is going too well, you're walking into
an ambush." -Infantryman's Journal
"No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection."
"Any ship can be a minesweeper ... once."
-Anon Naval brass
"Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to
do." -Unknown Marine Recruit
"Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you."
-Your Buddies
"If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up
with him." Unknown
"Aim towards the Enemy."
-Instruction printed on US Army Rocket Launcher
"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend.
- USMC Training Bulletin
"Cluster bombing from B-52's is very, very accurate.
The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground."
-USAF literature
"If the enemy is in range, so are you."
- Infantryman's Journal
"A slipping trigger gear could let your M203 grenade
launcher fire when you least expect it. That would
make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit."
Army's Magazine of Preventive Maintenance.
"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over
the area you just bombed."
-US Air Force Manual
"Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo."
-Infantryman's Journal
"Tracers work both ways."
-US Army Ordnance Manual
"Five-second fuses only last three seconds."
-Infantryman's Journal
"Bravery is being the only one who knows you're
afraid." --David Hackworth
"If your attack is going too well, you're walking into
an ambush." -Infantryman's Journal
"No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection."
"Any ship can be a minesweeper ... once."
-Anon Naval brass
"Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to
do." -Unknown Marine Recruit
"Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you."
-Your Buddies
"If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up
with him." Unknown
Funny war story:
I was in a fighting hole in Kuwait with my cpt. during Gulf War I. It was night time and he was alseep while I was on watch. Something you might not know about the Middle East is that wild gerbils THRIVE there like an infestation.
I was getting fed up with the little rodents chewing through my bags to get at my snack food and I kind of freaked out. I grab this piece of my cot that's like an aluminium club and raise it over my head to smack a gerbil. I also happen to be standing above the captain. It's right about then that he decides to wake up and see's me hovering over him with a club raised. It was hillarious! He throws his hands over his face and sort of makes this aaahh noise before I start cracking up and explain what I was doing.
He must of been having Nam flashbacks from his unit trying to frag him, he was kind of a jerk. I sometimes wonder if I could have been court marshled for that if he hadn't believed me...
I was in a fighting hole in Kuwait with my cpt. during Gulf War I. It was night time and he was alseep while I was on watch. Something you might not know about the Middle East is that wild gerbils THRIVE there like an infestation.
I was getting fed up with the little rodents chewing through my bags to get at my snack food and I kind of freaked out. I grab this piece of my cot that's like an aluminium club and raise it over my head to smack a gerbil. I also happen to be standing above the captain. It's right about then that he decides to wake up and see's me hovering over him with a club raised. It was hillarious! He throws his hands over his face and sort of makes this aaahh noise before I start cracking up and explain what I was doing.
He must of been having Nam flashbacks from his unit trying to frag him, he was kind of a jerk. I sometimes wonder if I could have been court marshled for that if he hadn't believed me...
/me makes a note never to fall asleep with Hoax nearby.
Those could of been lemmings! My breathern! NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
Shoot, I tottaly intened to write: No offense SL.
But I forgot... anyway it was war, and it was me or the gerbils. If you'd've seen the look's they'd give me you'd understand. And if you think its easy to come up with a bag of chips ahoy in the middle of the desert you don't understand the importance of my mission.
/me looks through SL, with 1000yard stare
/me swats space gerbils off Magus with tri-flairs
But I forgot... anyway it was war, and it was me or the gerbils. If you'd've seen the look's they'd give me you'd understand. And if you think its easy to come up with a bag of chips ahoy in the middle of the desert you don't understand the importance of my mission.
/me looks through SL, with 1000yard stare
/me swats space gerbils off Magus with tri-flairs
Err? Gerbils aren't lemmings, f00!
"This side towards enemy. This side to friendlies"
Claymore Remote/Tripwire Mine
"If you can read this, your probably in the wrong place"
Original Plate For Jetblast Warning on USS Abraham Lincoln
Claymore Remote/Tripwire Mine
"If you can read this, your probably in the wrong place"
Original Plate For Jetblast Warning on USS Abraham Lincoln
Sort of funny story along these lines:
Ranger Challenge is sort of a varsity ROTC sport. You and your team compete against other schools and military acadamies in a bunch of physical and other miscellaneous Army type tests.
Anyway, one of the senior members of the team gets down at the 25m range to do the rifle event, gets set, zeroes in. He's totally concentrated, and is one of the better shots in the battalion. The timer starts and he plinks away. After he shot his 40 rounds, he gets up and comes out with this big grin on his face and says, "Damn, that felt good!"
As the paper targets roll back everyone is congratulating him on his supposedly good shooting. Then he gets a look at it - not one hit!
Turns out he managed to shoot the target in the next lane over! Needless to say we lost that event, and he never heard the end of it. Well, until this year, when we came in first and everyone shot well ;)
Ranger Challenge is sort of a varsity ROTC sport. You and your team compete against other schools and military acadamies in a bunch of physical and other miscellaneous Army type tests.
Anyway, one of the senior members of the team gets down at the 25m range to do the rifle event, gets set, zeroes in. He's totally concentrated, and is one of the better shots in the battalion. The timer starts and he plinks away. After he shot his 40 rounds, he gets up and comes out with this big grin on his face and says, "Damn, that felt good!"
As the paper targets roll back everyone is congratulating him on his supposedly good shooting. Then he gets a look at it - not one hit!
Turns out he managed to shoot the target in the next lane over! Needless to say we lost that event, and he never heard the end of it. Well, until this year, when we came in first and everyone shot well ;)
HA HA!
Sounds kinda like me now up on my school range.
Currently, half of my platoon is working on a CPR certification (I already passed and have mine) while the other half is working on qualifying with .177 caliber Air Rifles upon the school's indoor shooting range.
Well, my platoon is lagging behind the rest so we're rushed to finish our zeros on the scopes. Sadly, I cant zero mine because I put the first 2 pellets perfectly together but on the third shot, I throw the pellet and thus, I can not accuratly triangulate any corrections to the rifle.
So Thursday, my Company Commander (also the Range Officer) gets tired of it, comes over, and coaches me through the entire 3 shot triangle...I throw the 3rd so he has me fire and 4th and 5th...those hit perfectly with the 1st and 2nd...
Sounds kinda like me now up on my school range.
Currently, half of my platoon is working on a CPR certification (I already passed and have mine) while the other half is working on qualifying with .177 caliber Air Rifles upon the school's indoor shooting range.
Well, my platoon is lagging behind the rest so we're rushed to finish our zeros on the scopes. Sadly, I cant zero mine because I put the first 2 pellets perfectly together but on the third shot, I throw the pellet and thus, I can not accuratly triangulate any corrections to the rifle.
So Thursday, my Company Commander (also the Range Officer) gets tired of it, comes over, and coaches me through the entire 3 shot triangle...I throw the 3rd so he has me fire and 4th and 5th...those hit perfectly with the 1st and 2nd...
"and the three hundredth and fifty first and three hundred and fifty second...."
I feel for you. I was trying to zero a nice, new 4-12x Leopold at 100 yds, got three shots overlapping. I go to 300 yards, and three shots land within an inch of each other, but four inches below and to the right of the center. Nevermind that the 100 yds shots were above and to the left. Maybe my bullets are curving..... :\
The gun was an R270L, and I was using Winchester 180 gr.
I feel for you. I was trying to zero a nice, new 4-12x Leopold at 100 yds, got three shots overlapping. I go to 300 yards, and three shots land within an inch of each other, but four inches below and to the right of the center. Nevermind that the 100 yds shots were above and to the left. Maybe my bullets are curving..... :\
The gun was an R270L, and I was using Winchester 180 gr.
Camps, that's why i always use 5 round patterns.... you can throw out at least 1 if you pull it. I was out sighting in my 10/22 the other day with a really crappy box of .22 WMRs... 3 misfires in the whole box, and they were inconsistant as s***. 2 inch patterns with a gun vice holding the rifle centered on the center.
And at 300 yards a lot of things could work against you, wind is a big one, and 180 grain bullets are heavy. For that kind of range i'd suggest getting lighter rounds, 130 or 150 grain. They wont drop near as much. The wind will mess with them more tough
And at 300 yards a lot of things could work against you, wind is a big one, and 180 grain bullets are heavy. For that kind of range i'd suggest getting lighter rounds, 130 or 150 grain. They wont drop near as much. The wind will mess with them more tough
At school we use are Frenwaucbach (Sp? It's a German Company) 550s...
We fire a standard 4.5 mm Diameter (.177 cal) pellet at a 570 fps muzzel velocity.
The range is indoors so wind isn't a factor and the target is approx 15 meters away. Firing from prone position.
Camps: Another option is you could simply take into account weight and the like on your bullets and simply correct for that rather than the wind. Since wind would change more than the corrections for the bullet itself.
Urza: I feel for you. 3 misfires? How many rounds were in the box? Even with I'd say 600 rounds 3 misfires still seems high...although I havent fired my .22 in months...it's too snowy still up here in Alaska to really do much shooting...another month or so.
We fire a standard 4.5 mm Diameter (.177 cal) pellet at a 570 fps muzzel velocity.
The range is indoors so wind isn't a factor and the target is approx 15 meters away. Firing from prone position.
Camps: Another option is you could simply take into account weight and the like on your bullets and simply correct for that rather than the wind. Since wind would change more than the corrections for the bullet itself.
Urza: I feel for you. 3 misfires? How many rounds were in the box? Even with I'd say 600 rounds 3 misfires still seems high...although I havent fired my .22 in months...it's too snowy still up here in Alaska to really do much shooting...another month or so.
50 in a box...
WOW! Thats REALLY bad! I buy my rounds (more over, my Dad buys the rounds...some law or something) in about 550 rounds per box
Nah, it wasn't wind or range--I've shot 300 yds before many times and know how much to correct. There was also no wind or elevation to worry about. Beautiful day--perfect for sighting in.